Some Thoughts on and from "Captivating" by John and Stasi Eldredge

I don't know if there are any women visiting my blog - all the comments have come from men so far - but to my sisters out there, I want to recommend an awakening read. The Eldredges' new book "Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman's Soul" digs into the heart of every woman, revealing how we are created in God's image in a uniquely feminine way.

If you do not know that you are BEAUTIFUL, that beauty is your very essence as a woman, that you are worth fighting for - worth dying for! - that you are being romanced by the Creator of the universe (who is the Lover of your soul and who finds you captivating and delightful)... if you do not know that in Him you are enough and can rest, then I hope you will let God speak these things to you.

From "Captivating"

• The choice a woman makes is not to conjure beauty, but to let her defenses down...to let her heart show up. Beauty comes with it.
• Beauty...should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit. (1Peter 3:4) To have a gentle and quiet spirit is to have a heart of faith, a heart that trusts in God, a spirit that has been quieted by His love and filled with His peace. Not a heart that is striving and restless.
• I know in my quiet center where God dwells that He finds me beautiful, has deemed me worthy, and in Him I am enough.
• A woman of true beauty is a woman who in the depths of her soul is at rest, trusting God because she has come to know Him to be worthy of her trust. She exudes a sense of calm, a sense of rest, and invites those around her to rest as well. She speaks comfort; she knows that we live in a world at war, that we have a vicious enemy, and our journey is through a broken world. But she also knows that because of God all is well, that all will be well.
• Women who are stunningly beautiful have come to know that when everyone and everything has left them, God is there.
• When you're with a beautiful woman, you find room for your soul. It expands. You can breathe again. You can rest. It is good. You are fee to be you. It is one of life's greatest gifts.
• I am worth dying for to the LORD of the universe! He has been romancing me and will continue for my whole life. My God finds me lovely - He is captivated by me, enthralled by my beauty. He has fought for me, and will fight for me until He comes or calls me home.
• Our hearts yearn to be loved intimately, personally, and yes, romantically. We are created to be the object of desire and affection of one who is totally and completely in love with us. And we are. God wants intimacy with us. In order to have it, we, too, must offer it to Him.
• For a woman to unveil her beauty means she is offering her heart...offering her presence....To come unguarded, undistracted - and be fully present, fully engaged with whoever we are with at that moment.
• A woman who is full of tender mercy and soft vulnerability is a powerful, lovely woman.
• The scariest thing for women is to offer our beauty into situations where we don't know if it will make any difference. Or worse, that we will be rejected...We can't wait until we feel safe to love and invite...God calls us to stop hiding, to stop dominating, to trust him, and to offer our true selves....to entice, allure, and invite others to Jesus by reflecting His glory in our lives.
• Unveiling our beauty is how we live by faith...Unveiling our beauty is our greatest expression of hope...To offer beauty now is an expression of hope that it will be completed...And unveiling our beauty is our greatest expression of love, because it is what the world needs most from us....Our focus shifts from self-protection to the hearts of others. We offer Beauty so that their hearts might come alive, be healed, know God. That is love.

Are you inspired? Doubtful? You ARE beautiful, my sisters. You are. Ask the LORD to show you your beauty, show you how He is romancing you today. Because He KNOWS you're beautiful, and He IS romancing you. That doubt you feel is Satan's doing because he knows you're beautiful, too, and he hates it. Rebuke him. Tell him he's a liar and you're in your Father's Hand. Get away from you, he has no authority over you. You belong to Jesus, and you are worthy. You are precious and chosen. You are beautiful and strong and you are enough in Christ. You are enough.

Men, I encourage you to read this, also (and women to read "Wild at Heart" - digging into the soul of men). Especially if you may be a father someday. Your daughters will either be affirmed or deeply wounded depending on whether you delight in them, offer them your strength and protection - or not. Chances are, the woman you love or will love someday has been wounded, and even though we find our healing and restoration and beauty in God, we need our men to understand our hearts, just as you need us to understand yours.

There is a Redeemer: Jesus, God's own Son. Precious Lamb of God, Messiah! Holy One

This morning's message from Sunday school and the sermon opened my eyes to a new understanding of what it means for Christ to have come to fulfill the Law.

We're studying worship in Sunday school right now and have been searching out the foundations: the concepts, for lack of a better word at present. *worship is ALL of our lives, every part, not just singing on Sunday mornings - it is a God-entranced life, showing the worth of God in everything *engaging God, loving Him, praising Him, serving Him, loving each other, eating, drinking, brushing our teeth... doing all for Him and through Him with our whole hearts, out of sincere love *worshiping not only sincerely, but truthfully according to His pleasure, His word.

Today Andy spoke about Christ as the connection between the Old Testament and the New Testament. Three purposes of the OT, when looking at the Bible as a whole:

1) To show the depravity of man
2) To illustrate God's unattainable standard
3) To point to the need of an ENDURING redemptive work (Christ)

God did not give the Law so that His people would obtain righteousness, but to show them their unrighteousness, their inability to be righteous, and their need of an enduring redeemer to be righteousness for them. That redeemer - the Messiah - was, and is, Christ Jesus, and in being the Perfect, Atoning Sacrifice He fulfilled the Law. We stand before God righteous because we are clothed with Christ's righteousness.

Likewise, we stand before God holy as He is holy because we stand in Christ's holiness. I was thinking about God's holiness on my lunchbreak (well, dinnerbreak) today at Shaw's. I pulled out my lovely journal and began writing my scattered thoughts.

"Looking around me outside here I see the busyness of the cars, the people exiting and entering, and all this manmade clutter of sorts... and then I see the trees. Tall, noble, still, quiet and peaceful trees. Behind them the sky rests - a calm, soft blue. This reminds me of the peace of God's holiness."

Wait a minute. Is His holiness peaceful, or is His peacefulness holy? Is His holiness pure, or is His purity holy? It becomes obvious when you pair His wrath with holiness. Of course, His wrath is holy, but His holiness is not always wrathful. Now, God's holiness is His "set apart-ness." What sets Him apart? What is He that no one else is? Perfect. His perfection is what sets Him apart. Perfection in all things.

God says, "Be holy as I am holy." He doesn't say "Try to be" or "Be almost as" - no, He says, "Be holy as I am holy." Be perfect like Me. In all things. How? We can't possibly. Christ must be our holiness. We will all die eventually. Maybe today. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe years from now. Or else Christ will return to be our Ultimate Redemption (or Condemnation if you've not surrendered your heart and life to His glory - if you condemn Him now, He will condemn you then. Surrender to Him now, and He will raise you as a joint heir to the Kingdom of Heaven for eternity!). Whether by death or by His return, we will face our Maker; holiness and righteousness will be required of us to enter the narrow gate to Life. God will ask where yours lie, and only One answer will satisfy: Jesus is my righteousness! Jesus is my holiness! He is IT. He is enough.

Nothing in my hand I bring,
Simply to Thy cross I cling.

Beauty Becometh the Beholder

Late yesterday, I floated in the deep end of my grandparents' pool, admiring the depths of the night sky but not searching them as I often do. Whisps of cloud hazed sleekly over one spot, then lingered to another, twisting through the constellations as I twisted through the cool water.

The pace of my life at this moment has a restfulness to it that I've never felt before, and I can't help but savor it. It is the rest that must come from 'rooting' - choosing to know and be known, love and be loved, HERE and NOW; a rest in the peace of my mom's salvation, and my dad's regeneration; a rest in my Father's love, and in my "fathers'" love. A rest in the realization of my beauty as a woman of God - a beauty my Father shows me daily, and my fathers reassure me of. A rest in friendship, a rest in hope. A rest in possibility and goodness. A rest in uncertainty and the unknown because my God is certain, and He makes Himself known.

Before I drove to Gram and Grandpa's last night, I'd been at the town library for a "Cooking with Edible Flowers" workshop taught by a local chef - a beautiful woman and mother with a beautiful garden and a love of beautiful food.

Beauty speaks ~ all shall be well
Beauty invites ~ explore me, search me, delight in me
Beauty nourishes ~ I offer you life, be well. Be satisfied and filled
Beauty comforts ~ peace, peace; rest a while in me
Beauty inspires ~ be beautiful as I am beautiful
Beauty transcends ~ there is a glory calling to you; this is as it was meant to be
(Observations from "Captivating" by John and Stasi Eldredge)

The dish we made tasted as a symphony sounds. It was beautiful in every sense of the word Beauty. The library is closing soon, but I will come back another day and share the recipe because we all should be so fortunate as to delight in this. We created a simple rice dish, using fresh herbs and edible flowers - a chorus of flavors. Licorice, lemon, onion, mint (all coming from various flowers) served with a stir-fry of zucchini, summer squash, and carrot... and day-lily petals which taste like sweet peas. Mmmm.

There is such enjoyment and rest to be found in the creation of an excellent meal, especially when it's a joint creation. Fresh and wholesome foods, shared exploration and discovery, joy in and at the culmination of the two: delicious, holistic nourishment and satisfaction are inevitable.

Beauty is not to be consumed carelessly nor hoarded with jealousy and fear, but delighted in and shone to the world - true Beauty is impossible to hide once recognized. So it is with our gracious Redeemer and the Creator of this beautiful universe and all therein. His Beauty Speaks, Invites, Nourishes, Comforts, Inspires, and Transcends - our recognition of His Beauty (because He opens our senses, minds, and hearts to know it) makes the joy of partaking become impossible to hide and compells us to share.

Do you know He is beautiful? Do you find rest in His beauty? Does it inspire you? Can you look in the face of your Creator and see that all is well, all will be well? I pray you can and do. I pray He makes Himself known to you, makes you taste and see that the LORD is gracious and good. Because He truly is, and there is REAL joy - everlasting! - to be found there.

May the grace and peace of the LORD, God be with you today and always. Amen.

Will my Brother Ever be my Brother?

An interesting thing: my brother will refute my words about the deity of Christ as found in the Bible, yet he will not read the Bible. He often talks about the King James Version being the only valid version, and tonight he told me to read about Jesus in the KJV and then come talk to him. When I told him to bypass me and go to the source himself, KJV or otherwise, he said he didn't need to, and didn't want to. How does that make sense? Before leaving for the library, I opened a KJV up to Luke and said I'd be glad to hear his thoughts on Jesus after he's read what the Lord says about Himself. Will he? Only if God makes him.

The frustrating thing with Heath is that he is so set in his opinions, yet they're based only on his own imaginings. He has read the Bible in the past, but he hasn't recently. There is a hatred of the word in him, a hatred of the truth. He sees it as lies and foolishness. This, God has said it would be of unbelievers.

At times it feels as though I am living with Satan, I have said this before. There is a living, breathing, prowling creature in my home looking to make me stumble, to make me doubt, to make me curse my Savior and turn my back on Him. The blessing is that he is quick to point out my sins, which my deceitful heart might otherwise keep me from seeing. Perhaps the Lord may use even my confessions as seeds planted. Lord transform my heart, and let my lips praise You to him for any goodness in me. Let my lips confess that the wickedness is my sin, not Yours. Still, Father, all will be bitterness and folly to him unless You regenerate his heart and give him new eyes to SEE. Oh, I pray for his salvation, Jesus. I am desperate for it. May I have the courage to pray for Thy will, and not my own. Be glorified. In Christ's name, Amen.

Later I will ask him if he'd like us both to read the gospel in the KJV and then talk about it together. At least offer even if he spits me off as usual. Father, forgive me for letting my anger get in the way - I didn't even think to ask him earlier. Loathe this sinful corpse!

Goodbye reader. I cannot type repentance. Pray for me. I've yet to comprehend the depth of my sinfulness. Pray that I would remember whence I came to my Savior, and remember the new life and breath that I found in Him that first night as His child. Pray that I would remember my first love and return to Him. But I must know my brokenness, and I don't fully. LORD, continue to show me my wickedness that I might more fully comprehend the depth of your grace and mercy, not just in my mind, but in my heart and soul. Thank you

By this all people will know you are Mine: Love One Another

John 13:31-35

When he had gone out, Jesus said, "Now the Son of Man is glorified, and God is glorified in Him. If God is glorified in Him, God will also glorify Him in Himself, and will glorify Him at once.

"Children, I am with you a little while longer. You will look for Me, and just as I told the Jews, 'Where I am going you cannot come,' so now I tell you.

"I give you a new commandment: that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you should also love one another. By this all people will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another."

Each morning (and sometimes afternoon), I go to work with excitement and wonder at what God will do this day. Who will He bring to buy meat? :) What insight will He give to my co-workers hearts, and how will He direct our conversation? Truly, the grocery store is proving to be a field white and ready for harvesting. I praise God for letting me be His worker.

That verse from John speaks aptly for God's blessed encounter today. A woman came for turkey mid-morning. I served her at the counter while Paula served another shopper next to me. This woman wore a beautiful cross pendant on her necklace, and when I told her I liked it she held it gently with her fingers, looking down at it, and said quietly, "I don't know what I'd do without it."

"Neither do I," I said, "The Lord is good." and her eyes teared up. "The Lord is good," I reassured her, "even when it doesn't seem like it."

"You're going to make me cry!" she laughed and wiped her eye, then sobered quickly and said simply, "Pray for my family today."

"Okay."

"Now I know why I'm buying meat," she laughed again shortly. "I didn't need any - had plenty at home..."

Her 18 year old daughter is having a baby next month. She is scared, but it's going to be okay. The Lord works everything out for His good, and that which surprises us is no surprise to Him. This daughter is His daughter, and He fashioned each day of her life when as yet there were none of them.

Her younger daughter came up next to her, and the woman smiled and hugged the girl, saying, "Look! She likes my necklace, and the Lord is good, even when it doesn't seem like it." She smiled at me and said, "Well, we'll be back again." I cannot explain the connection my heart felt to hers, except that Christ unites us. "I love you, my sister, " I said smiling. "I love you, too." This woman left with a radiance that was not there before, and that is the true unity of Christian love. Father, You are so good. I know I say that all the time, but You are. You Are.

John 13:35 sang out to me as I thought of what Paula's response to the interaction must have been. In a matter of minutes she watched two women go from strangers to sisters declaring love for each other. Imagine that from an unbeliever's perspective! Paula is quiet and non-confrontational. She didn't say anything. But she was right there the whole time. Only God knows. For now. :)

I also must thank You again, Father, for Curtis (the Christian I work with). How refreshing to have edifying conversation with my brother in the deli. :) I am challenged by him - and encouraged - and watching You use him to plant seeds in our co-workers and customers blesses me, also. Today a young man named Ivan came to visit, and I mis-heard his name as Isaac. Brenda, another deli worker, was saying how he is always smiling and Curtis agreed.

"Well, his name does mean laughter!" I said.

"Ivan?" Curtis asked.

"Oh, I thought it was Isaac. I don't know what Ivan means!" I felt a bit silly, but Curtis took the opportunity to tell the Bible story, and speak of God giving Abraham and Sarah their son Isaac in their VERY old age. It was such a neat moment.

Readers, please continue to pray for the deli. I will continue to report of God's shining light. He is so faithful, and works so powerfully - in us, through us, and despite us. To You be the glory!

Reflections on Psalm 119: 33-40

I've treasured psalm 119 since the first time I read it, even without being fully able to articulate what, exactly, struck me about it. There is so much therein to be meditated upon and savored. Yet I think I understand the essence that has captivated me: the psalmist's humble and God-entranced (to borrow Piper's synonym for "worship-ful") heart.

The author of psalm 119 knows God's word, knows His righteousness, and knows his own shortcomings and fallibility despite his sincerely passionate love of that word and longing to be obedient to it.

He understands God's word as a gift, as something to be cherished and learned deeply, and lived fully and completely.

He knows that he loves the LORD, that he delights in the law, but he also knows his flesh and the battle that rages. He knows his weakness and that the only way he can find that delight is by the LORD reviving him, leading him, and showing him His goodness over and over.

He understands his need for God in order to obey, to grow, to live, to delight. He has RELIANCE upon the LORD .



Teach me, O Lord, the way of Your statutes, And I shall keep it to the end. (It is evident that the psalmist knows the word - there are pieces of scripture throughout the psalm, yet again and again he pleads for God to teach him them. He understands his need of God's constant leading and deepening.)

Give me understanding, and I shall keep Your law; Indeed, I shall observe it with my whole heart. (a reliance upon God. Such longing and desire for obedience - just give me understanding, LORD, and I shall keep Your law..but I need You to give me understanding!)

Make me walk in the path of Your commandments, For I delight in it. (Even though he delights in walking in truth before God, he can only do that by the grace of God making him do so! We taste that the Lord is good and gracious because He makes us taste Him as so! To many He tastes bitter and offensive! But even when His words are honey to our lips, we need Him to spoon feed us Himself or we will not eat, because we need Him to sustain us.)

Incline my heart to Your testimonies, And not to covetousness. (Even when we know and love our LORD beyond explanation, we forsake Him easily. We need Him to preserve us in His grace and truth.)

Turn away my eyes from worthless things, And revive me in Your way. (In light of Christ, all other things are worthless - sinking sand. Revival is a gift from God, a convicting to remember your first love, repent of where you are at, and return to your first love. Other versions replace "revive" with "preserve." Our preservation requires a revival because we are continually fluctuating and only God's direct intervention sustains us in His grace.)

Establish Your word to Your servant, Who is devoted to fearing You. (I am devoted to fearing You, LORD, but the only way I can be devoted is if you establish Your word to me. There is such humility in the psalmist. Such submission to, and dependence upon, the LORD.)

Turn away my reproach which I dread, For Your judgments are good. (throughout the psalm, the author contrasts believers and unbelievers, and how each respond to him: the believers with brotherly love and appreciation - like-minded-ness; the unbelievers with hatred and persecution. The psalmist trusts God's justice, and understands the benefit of affliction for the glory of God.)

Behold, I long for Your precepts; Revive me in Your righteousness. (again, I am awed and inspired by the psalmist's humility and passion for God's word and glory. Here is a man wholly unsatisfied with mediocrity, luke-warm-ness, and stagnancy. He wants continual deepening and growth in knowing and loving his LORD. May we all have such longing to love and glorify Christ, our LORD and Savior; more today than we did yesterday, and more tomorrow than we do today. Knowing our wickedness and failure is not reason to lament, but reason to rejoice! God's grace is sufficient and in His mercy we are clothed in His righteousness!)

God, You are AMAZING! You are GOD!!

This post may be a bit erratic and disorganized because today was a "blow your mind" kind of day (God doing the mind-blowing, of course), and I'm still - ya know. Jeeped up a wee bit. :)

The play by play (of sorts):

5am - went to crew for Aunt Honi's hot air balloon again, and ended up FLYING!! So very awesome, that was. Those balloons are incredible, just awesome. Watching them inflate and then lift off... A few people came outside to wave and watch us fly over - a couple of little ones, and that was sweet. My ballooning days have come full circle already. :)

Then I went to church. I love church. I love my brothers and sisters, and am always encouraged by fellowship. I love sitting with my mom, who just a year ago wouldn't even come in the building. ha! God, You're awesome! I love partaking of the LORD's supper with her. Singing praises to our Father and Savior. I love singing praises to my God, regardless of my lack of singing ability. :) I love enjoying the music and the words. I love hearing what our Creator has been doing in our lives the past week, and what we're bringing before Him - surrendering to His will. I love that we share each other's joys and sorrows - and that both are always going on. I love that You are a God who listens and wants us to surrender everything to You. I love that You invite us to be part of Your work - what a huge blessing to see Your hands moving and changing lives, and that You're using us as part of that. Wow. Thank You, Father. "That's what I love about Sundays." :)

Then I went to work. I love my job. Actually, I love God, and I love that He's placed me so strategically and given me eyes to notice. I work in the deli at Shaw's Supermarket. It's AWESOME!! Two co-workers in particular I see the LORD drawing to Himself, and I'm so touched (that's not a precise enough word, but suffice it for now) to be an instrument for Him. For my LORD.

I'll give you some background. Please be praying for these people, and for the deli staff in general.

I've been working here just under two weeks.

Paula: about 60, works full time. Quieter, calm. Grandmother. Our first lunch break together, she told me about her "religious fanatic" relative who left a wealthy estate (millions) to Billy Graham and a "petty" few hundred thousand to the family. I told her that at least the Graham ministry is legit and that that money helped a LOT of people in need. She found out I was a Christian later when she asked what I was doing that night, and my answer was "going to prayer meeting at church." I AM one of those fanaticals! haha. A few days later when we worked together again, she said that Billy Graham had been on TV all the nights since we'd had lunch together. yeah. And she was watching.

Today we worked together again. She heard George and me (I'll tell you about him in a sec) talking about the Bible and when he went on break she asked what we were talking about.

Turns out, when Paula was 21, she had a baby girl who had Downsyndrome. Her pastor at the time told her that the baby was born as so because Paula hadn't prayed enough during the pregnancy. man. I asked her about her daughter, and she cried as she told me about the girl's life (she died at 18). I tried to assure her of her pastor's misleading, and of God's goodness. Our fallible human-ness is so evident. Again and again people tell me of gross misleadings by Christian ministers in their lives. Wolves dressed as sheep? or just a moment's stumble? A careless word? Let's remember to pray for our leaders, and for each other. One sick member, and the entire Body is deemed diseased. Almighty God, make and keep us healthy in Your grace and truth!

Dear Lord, I pray I might show Paula Your mercy and love, and that I might continue to share Your truth. She is in Your hands, You know her heart and her life. Your will be done.

George: 18, just graduated high school. Calls himself a "liberal Baptist." Admittedly living in sin with no seeming desire to change. Yet he is passionate about loving people and serving - being a "good person" not for any outward reward, but simply because one ought to be. He has obviously read the Bible. I sense that he wants the peace of Christ, (and he knows cognitively that peace is in Christ), but he has yet to surrender the lusts of the flesh. This is a really cool guy here that God is drawing, also. I'm excited to watch.

So this evening we worked together 1pm to 9:30pm, and talked non-stop (between customers. Praise God it was a slow night). By the end of the night I invited him and his family to church, and he's excited about coming to a body of "authentic believers." It will be awesome to see the transformation when he does surrender all. When his "faith" is beyond cognitive, as the Spirit lives within him. Oh, praise God! With Christ, all things are possible. Again, as always, Your will be done.

Oh! And another cool thing at work today: I sliced some turkey and bologna for a man and then afterward he walked away slightly then turned back and handed me a track and said, "Here's something to read. It's a good message." And I said, "I know this message! Jesus is my Lord and Savior!" I was so excited. Every day, God is evident if we look for Him, but today it's like He was nailing up posters or something. He was everywhere, whether I was looking or not! The man went on shopping, and I decided to share God's work in the deli with him, so I went to find him nearby, and asked him to pray for the deli, and for Paula and George, and thanked him for doing God's work, passing out tracks. It was an encouragement, hugely. You're awesome. Thank You.

And a final note, last night my dad asked my mom to spend their "date night" reading the "church book." (They're reading "9 signs of a healthy church" for their couples' Bible study). Frustrating part: my mom didn't want to. I talked to her about it this morning. Pride: she's learning to reject it, but last night it got the best of her. Growth is a process, don't I know it. Don't we all.

But God is victorious, and every work He has begun will be completed in perfection. That is our steadfast hope and expectation.

In Christ's name, I lift all this up to You, Father. Amen.